Laura Lamarca's Memoirs of a Messed-up Mum is a striking new collection of poetry and prose, written in diary form. Drawing upon great personal grief, Laura's collection explores universal human emotions and possesses an extraordinary depth of feeling. Here at Iceberg Tales, we are very proud to bring you Laura Lamarca's work, and we hope you find her insights as fascinating as our editor did.
Editor:
How long have you been writing poetry and what was it that first led you to write?
Laura Lamarca:
I’ve been writing poetry for a little over 15 years. I first began writing as a way of releasing emotions that were bigger than me, ones that completely overwhelmed me on a daily basis. I was widowed shortly after I found my poetic voice and found the written word to be highly therapeutic. I was diagnosed with Emotional Borderline Personality Trait Disorder (EBPTD) within weeks of being widowed…this basically means that my emotional ability to cope was not nurtured in childhood and thus, when things happened, my emotional world fell apart. I’ve since learned to manage and overcome the obstacles of that illness, but I still have days when I’m less balanced than I might ideally like.
E:
The collection is in diary form, which bears connotations of privacy and intimacy, how early on in the process did you decide to structure the collection in this manner and why?
LL:
This particular collection of poems was written during a time when I was consulting with a psychiatrist to ascertain if being widowed had had a long-lasting detrimental affect on my mental health. My coping mechanisms have always been less than conventional. I struggled to open up, to share my thoughts and feelings, so I wrote a diary instead, in my own environment, where I felt most secure. Thankfully, it was determined that I was not mentally ill…simply “different” than textbook cases.
E:
Your poems shift between the first and third person. Do you have specific reasons for using first person for certain poems? Are these more personal than others for example?
LL:
If I’m feeling vulnerable or the poem itself contains a truth not entirely of my own, then I will use third person. Self-preservation is inherent in all human beings and this is where mine is most evident.
E:
The poems appeared to me to be very self-reflective and there was a persistent feeling of reluctance as if the poetic voice was compelled to speak against its better judgement. Do you feel this is fair and how does it compare to the actual process of writing the collection?
LL:
When I write and put my poetry into the public forum, I do so with the hope that my readers will apply my words to themselves. As humans, we’re not too dissimilar and poetry is a voice, a universal voice, as are emotions. Many of us are silenced…be that by abuse, circumstance, situation etc. we feel that the only way to protect ourselves and others, is to stay silent. Yet every timid voice breaks free eventually. Baby steps eventually become marathon runners on fast feet.
E:
Do you have a favourite poem and, if so, what is it?
LL:
Surprisingly, I don’t have a favourite poem. I didn’t read poetry before I began writing poetry. I’m not what one would consider an “educated poet”…I don’t write from a well of academic knowledge simply because I can – I write because I must, because my soul dictates it.
E:
The entire collection has a rhythmic, echoic quality. Our particular favourite was the 1st January. On this note, how to you respond to readers expressing their own preferences for certain poems? Is it difficult for you?
LL:
I was a musician before I was a poet. Melody is a natural part of who I am. I welcome the perspectives and opinions of others…it teaches me the view from fresh eyes and hearts and opens up my creative world to new possibilities. I especially welcome constructive criticism…without it, I do not grow.
E:
What can we expect from Laura Lamarca in the future?
LL:
Truth. It’s all I’ve ever had and all I have to give.
E:
Finally, what is your favourite Iceberg Tales release to date?
LL:
Law School at Night by Jordan Hamel.